Here I sit in the dead of night
While others are asleep
I'm twisted and bound tight
Lying again
Telling myself it will all be okay
Jumbled words
So many things I wanted to say
I pushed the envelope too far yet again
Lost my lover
Lost my friend
Holding on to something so tightly
Scared to let it go
My inner emotions have now hit
An all-time low
Like smacking my head face first
Into an unmovable brick wall
In agony
I will crawl
It hurts
As if forced to crawl on broken glass
Tears me to shreds
I'm hoping this pain won't last
Walking around confused
Always seem to be lost
My love you refused
My past you tossed
Now I'm forced to walk alone
Against the crowd
Wishing to find my heart a home
Wishing I could figure all this out somehow
Where do I turn
What do I do
Do I wait for my chance
To meet someone new
Do I make my own road
Blaze my own path
Do I sit back and cry
Or fake a few laughs
I have become something I never thought I would be
I've become alone and humbled
This wasn't the life for me
I pray to God
I beg for another shot
I feel like I'm being taught a lesson
Love is fragile
Never meant to be dropped
At times it feels like a knife
Being twisted in my gut
Makes me panic
Puts me deeper in a rut
Things like this aren't meant to be said
To an open crowd
Not caring if anyone's listening
I would shout it out loud
I guess I'll wait for love
Be in mind not patiently
I see it around every corner
Just beyond the grasp of me
Turning me in circles
Keeping me lost
It's a maddening cycle
But to love
It has it's cost
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